PARENT'S STATUS - 2

From infancy to maturity, it is unparalleled tender love and care of the parents which brings the child from the stage of weakness and helplessness to perfect strength and independence. A child is a part of his parents especially the mother who undergoes prolong pains and sufferings first to carry him or her for nine months, after his birth her discomfort continues by sleepless nights. During pregnancy, her blood is diverted to the baby. If there is any one, after the Creator, who is directly responsible for the existence and progress of a child, it is the parents. It is for this reason that Qur’an has mentioned the obedience of parents side by side with the worship of Allah.

Parental Status according to the Noble Qur’an:

1. Surah Isra verse 23, “Your Lord has ordained that you must not worship any thing other than Him, and that you must be kind to your parents. If either or both of your parents should become advanced in age, do not express to them words which show your slightest disappointment. Never dispute with them but always speak to them with kindness.”
2. Surah Isra verse 24, “Be humble and merciful towards them and say “Lord, have mercy upon them as they cherished me in my childhood.”
3. Surah Baqarah verse 83, “We made a covenant with the children of Isra’il that they should not worship any one except Me, that they should serve their parents.”
4. Surah Nisa verse 36, “Worship Allah and consider no one equal to Him. Be kind to your parents..." 
5. Surah Inaam verse 151, (Muhammad), say, “Let me tell you about what your Lord has commanded: D o not consider anything equal to Allah; be kind to your parents…..”
6. Surah Luqmaan verse 14, “(Concerning his parents), We advised the man, whose mother bears him with great pain (weakness after weakness) and breast-feeds him for two years, to give thanks to Me first and then to them; to Me all things proceed.”
7. Surah Luqmaan verse 15, “If they try to force you to consider things equal to Me, of whom you have no knowledge, do not obey them. Maintain lawful relations with them in this world and follow the path of those who turn in repentance to Me. To Me you will all return and I shall tell you all that you have done.”
8. Surah Ahqaf verse 15, “We have advised the human being to be kind to his parents; his mother bore him with hardship and delivered him while suffering a great deal of pain. The period in which his mother bore and weaned lasted for thirty months. When he grew up to manhood and became forty years old, he then said, “Lord, inspire me to give You thanks for the bounties You have granted to me and my parents, and to act righteously to please You. Lord, make my offspring virtuous. Lord, I turn to You in repentance; I am a Muslim.”
9. Surah Ibrahim verse 41, “Lord, On the Day of Judgment, forgive me and my parents and all the believers.”
10. Surah Nuh verse 28, “Lord, forgive me, my parents, the believers who have entered my home and all believing men and women.”
11. Surah Ankabut verse 8, “We have advised the human being, “Be kind to your parents. Do not obey them if they force you to consider equal to Me things which you do not know are such.”
12.  Surah Baqarah verse 215, “They ask you what to spend for the cause of Allah. (Muhammad) tell them that what ever you spend, give it to your parents, the relatives, the orphans…..What ever good you do, Allah is certainly aware of it”

Hadees-Qudsi (Words of Allah not included in the Noble Qur’an)  

I swear by My Glory and Power that if a (child is) disobedient to his parents comes to Me with all the good deeds of all the prophets; I will not accept them from him.

Holy Prophet (S.A.W.S.) said, “The Greatest Sins are ‘Shirk’ and disobedience of parents.”

2. “One who displeases his parents (it is as if) he displeased Allah”

3. “One who hurts his parents, hurts me and one who hurts me hurts Allah. And the one who hurts Allah is accursed.”

4. A young man was on his death-bed, when the Holy Prophet (S.A.W.S.) came and sat beside him and asked him to recite “Shahadatain” but the youth could not speak. The Holy Prophet (S.A.W.S.) asked if his mother was present. A woman who was sitting next to him said that she was his mother. He inquired from her if she was displeased with her son. She replied that she was not speaking with her son for the last six months. The Holy Prophet asked her to pardon him and as soon as she pardoned him he could speak the “Shahadatain”. The Holy Prophet (S.A.W.S.) asked him, “What do you see at this moment?” The youth replied that he was seeing a dark and smelly man was holding him and was not letting him go. The Holy Prophet (S.A.W.S.) said, “Recite the dua: Ya Man Yaqbalul Yasira Wa Ya’fo Anil Kathira Iqbal Minnil Yasira Wa Afo Anil Kathira”. Then asked, “Now what do you see?” He replied, “A fair complexion handsome man is moving towards me” The Holy Prophet (S.A.W.S.) said, “Keep on repeating this dua”. After repeating this dua, he said, “O Prophet of Allah, both of them have disappeared”. After this the face of the Holy Prophet (S.A.W.S.) was illuminated with joy. He said, “O Allah forgive the sins of this young man” Then the youth passed away.

5. “By Allah, in whose hands is my life, to serve parents for a day and night is equal to a year of Jihad.”

6. A man came to the Holy Prophet (S.A.W.S.) and said, “I have committed every type of sins. Is there any repentance for me?” The Holy Prophet said, “Go and do goodness to your father so that your sins may be expiated.” After the man had left, he said,” If his mother had been alive, it would have been more meritorious to do good to her.”

7. “There are three types of sins which are punished in this world; the first is “Aq-alWaladain”, second is injustice upon men, and third is thanklessness of favors”

8. “Aq-al-Waladain causes poverty and misfortunes.”

Aq-alWaladain: Means the son or daughter causes disrespect to their parents by speech or action. Or they disobey them in the matters which are reasonable and lawful.

Some time, the parents are pleased with their children during their life-time but become

“Aq” or disown them after their death and vice-versa.

Parent’s rights after their death:

First is to carryout their Wajib acts which they did not perform during their life time like prayers, fasts, Hajj if it became obligatory, and repayment of their debts.

Second is to act upon their Will and Testament.

Third is to perform good deeds for their salvation i.e. give Sadaqa, to perform charitable acts for their “Sawab-e-Jariya”, recite prayers for them.

Respect for the parents: As a mark of respect: one must not address them by name, one must not walk in front of them, while eating meals one must not start before them, while speaking one’s voice must not rise above their voice, one must not do any thing which may bring bad reputation to them, must provide necessities before making them to beg for it.